Madison Nichole Vought

this is the name of my new niece!!! she is such a pretty little thing. she is the child of my brother Jon and SIL Shonte. she had a little trouble when she first arrived but the is kickin ass now and we are all ready for her to come home . i cant wait to hold her myself!!! i want to see my son interact with her and see his happines with haveing her around.she was born monday 5lbs 8oz. 18.5" YEAH!!!!! :)

Right.......mmmhummmm....right, right.

MASS CONFUSION AND HYSTERIA, and then afterwards everyone sat around and listened as the higherarchy shook their heads (yes, yes, ummhumm yep , yes) and felt better about it all. those of you who know what im talking about are thinking, umhumm yep ....yes. lol

A Cool New Show

Anthoney Bourdain No Reservations i have watched this show(the same episode) twice. i think it will be a cool new show.

Yes My Son is Spidey

this is the way i see him every night. he loves this old spiderman outfit. thank goodness its almost time again this one is about gone .

Thats My Boy!!!

here in mcghee again. seems like my trips over here are closer and closer. they stay 2 weeks apart, but i do feel like im living in fast forward. i recently got a new chair in my apartment. my son and i sat in it together, and he also sat in the old chair. we were there, just the two of us. there is something very fulfilling about that. i remember when i was married last that my happiest times were at home. it was the HOME part. Whether my ex was there or not, home was watching tv or working on the pc or sleeping. i really enjoyed the kids coming in and out of the room and talking with them and so on. my son and i are trying to get this back. Whether it is with the othe kids in the house or just the two of us. caden brought it up the other night. he said " we are a happy family are we daddy" and i just couldnt believe it. i was thinking that very thing at that very time. thats my boy!!! this came at a great time i am having a hard time with the whole love thing. i really needed that kind of reassuring honesty and plain straight talk. leave it to a child to cut through the red tape and all of the complication of adult life and speak to me. thank god for my son. he is a brilliant light with many vibrant colors shining throughout my life, illuminating and coloring my world. what a great kid.

still alive here in crossett

it has been one of those strange times here in my world i am in the long slow prosses of breaking up with some one that i love , who loves me. how silly is this i want more and so does she BUT she just isint ready. thats the best explanation that i can seem to get. i wish i could get more. i wish this wasent happenning. i ame the one who seems to be killing it. i cant keep myself from going on about it. just cant seem to stop. every time i talk to her its all i can talk about. she wants me to stop pushing. and i just want to get it talked about so i will see what her needs are. i get frustrated about her inability to speek her feelings. she isint a bad person but still whats happenning to me is the same as if she was. how do u fix this? how do i stop? i will be the first to scream out loud that i have ocd and bad. i cant let it go...... i dont want to push.....but i am in a full eppisode with this issue. and the more i try to get it done with the more she retracts. AAAaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh. what a cycle. its so very exausting. i just want to matter, i just want someone to give back what im giving. man wheeeeewww. didnt think this was gonna blow out when i started this post sorry folks.

Who eats that much oatmeal?

this town needs and enema ........ i am in mcgehee and although i dont want any work(after all i get paid the same to sit on my ass and surf the net as i do to work like a guy who works a lot), i would like the ppl who come in here to need the services that i provide. most of the ppl that i meat here are nice enough. some folks smile and some say hi, especially at walmart.
lately the walmart "associates" are busting their stitches to say "hi" and "oh, excuse me" . and as always "can i help you" whats with that??? yes u can help me , id like a double handful of what your taking. its cool that they'r happy. i like that.
anyway, so i dont have a lot to do here but the "job stuff" .what i do have is lots of time to piss off and spend money. s i have a real problem with OCD and thats not good when i have so much free time. one of the most annoying manifestations of this is that i floss my teeth way too much. ok.....so im in walmart getting some junk food , more shampoo and soap, when i passed the "bad place". i passed......the tooth brush isle. but i had a tooth brush, a new one. what else could i get on this lane? i looked no further than the first display, and there i saw them. hanging there all innocent, shaa right! i had the overwhelming need for a tooth scraper, mirror, pick like poker thing combo . this is $5 worth of pure unnecessary pain and obsession. man i have tried every way i can think to make sense of these mean and cold tools. the mirror is cool but it just makes me want to use the death bringing tools of despair. these things are brutal. they dont bend to go around your teeth like floss. they WILL take off anything u push against. i cant imagine using these things to earn my living. as i sit here and type i look over at these things, they just lay there on the little tray above the sink. you wouldnt think that they are evil just laying there so still but ill bet they stand over my bed when i sleep, waiting for their chance. AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
as for the tital of this post. the dear sweet women who work in the kitchen over here, some times they will fix me a breakfast tray. this will consist of 3 to 5 pieces of bacon, a large spoonful of eggs, some kind of bread. and a whopping 4 pound mountian of oatmeal. so, my question is this.......who eats that much oatmeal? what kind of superhero would it take? i feel pain just lugging it over to the trash can. sheeeheeezzzz. :)